Being More than Sorry


This morning I came across an email sent to me several years ago by a co-worker I had unknowingly offended. It was one of those “said in passing” but “taken to heart” misunderstandings that happens when folks work together. The email was written hastily, emotionally and I quickly surmised I had chosen a poor time to use careless words. I immediately apologized to her, accepted full responsibility and promised to try and be more careful with my speech and timing.

Assuming the ordeal had been settled I went about the rest of my day as usual until a few hours later when I received a second email. Figuring it was an “all is forgiven, let’s learn and move on” type of letter I was surprised when instead it was a, “I’d like another pound of flesh! I’m still angry and not ready to accept your apology!” email.

At first I was confused and frustrated by her reply but as I reflected upon the email I realized that if I was truly sorry, and desired her forgiveness, it would be on her timetable, her terms, not mine. I wrote her back, once again expressing my remorse, and let her know that when she was ready we could talk about what had happened, how and why it hurt her, so I could be sure it wouldn’t happen again.

Apologies are often done quickly and easily. We let the words; “I’m sorry.” roll off our tongues and assume everything’s okay. A true apology, real repentance, means not just being remorseful but also bearing the burden of restoration and restitution.




About is a place for sojourners walking this spiritual path called life. - Brian Loging,, is lead writer at tWS. He is also a speaker, author, poet.

Posted on May 1, 2015, in Life and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. Great thought. Worth reflecting on.


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