Yesterday, while weed-whacking around the house, underneath a large tree, I felt a sudden tingling sensation on my face and then a spider crawled down from my forehead and on my glasses! It was the only thing I could see. All other things faded from view while this eight-legged insect crawled on my dome. My hands, full of the weed eater put it down as quickly as possible and I swiped my face, brow, and head hoping to knock off the arachnid that seemed to drop from the sky. I never saw or felt it again after my; “Get off me!” dance and hoped it was gone for good. After shaking off the heebie-jeebies I thought about how silly I looked to any passerby who might have seen me. I was okay with that because they weren’t seeing the same thing.
Wisdom tells us that what we focus on is who we become. Our focus should be; love, kindness, mercy, forgiveness. However, too often we focus on what is right in front of us, whatever life brings our way. The next scheduled event, calendar item, emergency, chaotic event, becomes who we are, what our life is about and we never move beyond surface emotions or an insubstantial spirituality.
Focus on one thing long enough and it becomes your destiny.
Other People’s Drama –
At one time during my adult years, I came across a quote that read; “An emergency on your part does not constitute a crisis on mine.” I don’t remember where it was but the quote has stuck with me.
There can be an almost irresistible draw when someone has a juicy piece of gossip or wants your opinion about a situation they’re facing. Before you offer your “two-cents” remember that once you pass through that door, enter yourself into other people’s drama, it may be impossible to get out. A couple of weeks ago I had a friend who was starting through the drama door and I reminded them; “make sure its worth it.”
The main issue with other people’s drama is there’s often a side to take, a team to join. This is usually the reason a person tells you about issues and problems in the first place. They want you in their corner. We puff ourselves up thinking; “They need our help. Our advice. Our support.” However, what they mostly want is someone to affirm them in the decisions they’ve already made.
I’m not telling people to not listen, empathize with others who need help, a willing ear or even a hand to pull them up but to understand that sometimes what people want and need are completely different things. Be aware and wary.