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Double Back

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Double Back –

Last night, after dinner, Beth wanted a popsicle. I was getting up anyway and told her I’d get her one. I opened the top freezer door on the refrigerator and grabbed two by mistake. One fell to the floor and using the three-second rule I quickly stooped down and picked it up. Unbeknownst to me, the freezer door was swinging back and when I was two-thirds up I whacked the top back of my head on the corner of the freezer door. “OUCH!” It hurt so much I crumpled to the floor rubbing the wounded area. Beth heard me, came and looked at it and thought there would be bruising and soreness. She was right. It never occurred to me until it “hit me” that the door was doubling back. My mind was elsewhere and the freezer door brought me back to reality.

I was listening to someone describe addiction this week and they said; “It gets inside of you. You think you have a handle on it and then you begin to crave it. It comes back again and again and again.” I thought about other things which come around over and over. Grieving the loss of a loved one who has passed on, anger at being taken advantage of, bitterness at being betrayed, the pain of past memories and experiences that hurt us emotionally and physically, drug, alcohol and other addictions, friends who have negative influences on us, wounds which seem to never heal. All of these can cause us to crumple to the floor when they double back into our lives.

There is a needed balance of awareness and acceptance. Awareness is needed because perhaps we can see it coming and side-step the toll it would take on our minds and spirits. Acceptance is important because we are human, are not all-powerful, and difficult and challenging experiences are part of what makes us unique.

It is in this balance we may find wisdom and peace.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

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Balancing Act

May 24

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

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Balancing Act –

There is an area in our yard next to the road that is tricky to mow. It is a sharp incline and in order to the get the job done the mower and the rider has to be at a steep angle. When I mow this particular spot in the yard I sit halfway on the seat with my body leaning in the opposite direction of the incline. The balance has to be perfect. Too far off the seat the mower doesn’t sense enough pressure on the seat and shuts off. Don’t lean far enough and there’s a chance the mower and rider could topple over. It’s a twenty-five yard long, difficult and dangerous, balancing act.

Life is also a balancing act. We live in perilous times. All one has to do is turn on the television, log online, and get the sense our families, communities, nations, and world is one mistake from toppling over into a dangerous place and we may not recover.

The problem is balance. Sides are chosen, political parties picked, litmus tests are given, judgments made and those on the other side, even ones seeking a middle way, are labeled as; “the enemy.” I don’t know if we are going to make it back from the edge of disaster but I do know it takes more strength to listen than to ignore, to understand than to shout down, to accept than to reject, to see others as us than ‘less than,’ to find balance than to demand conformity.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Contemplative

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Tags: ##opposite, #accept, #act, #angle, #area, #balance, #Balancing, #blessings, #chance, #chosen, #communities, #conformity, #dangerous, #dangerousplace, #demand, #difficult, #direction, #disaster, #edge, #enemy, #families, #findbalance, #ignore, #judgments, #labeled, #leaning, #lessthan, #life, #litmustests, #middleway, #mistake, #nation's, #otherside, #particular, #parties, #perfect, #perilous, #political, #pressure, #problem, #reject, #road, #seeking, #sense, #sharpincline, #shoutdown, #sides, #steep, #strength, #thewannabesaint.com, #times, #topple, #toppling, #tricky, #understand, @BrianLoging, Listen, World

Can You Hear Me?

May 19

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

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Can You Hear Me?

Earlier this week I had a frustrating conversation with someone (not Beth). I was attempting to explain and they weren’t receptive to my words body language and insistence. Finally, we decided we’d try again at a later date when cooler heads would prevail.

It is amazing how difficult it can be to communicate; listen and speak. It doesn’t only involve ears and mouths but minds, bodies, times, temperaments, and most of all the willingness of both parties to check their egos at the door. This is where I made my mistake. I was attempting to force someone to listen, to see and understand what I was doing and it wasn’t taking. Forcing people to do anything rarely, if ever, works. After we both stepped away I realized the whole situation was my fault. I wasn’t showing empathy but exasperation and that’s never a good head-space to be in when trying to speak to someone.

Thankfully, when we came back together I was able to recognize where I went wrong and tried a different way. I instructed and acted more respectfully and thoughtfully. I made sure not to try to cram information into someone but to let them absorb it. When it was over I apologized for my shortsightedness and hope this is a lesson I will take to heart.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Leadership

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Tags: #absorb, #acted, #amazing, #apologized, #attempting, #blessings, #bodies, #bodylanguage, #bothparties, #CanYouHearMe, #communicate, #conversation, #coolerheads, #cram, #decided, #differentway, #difficult, #ears, #egos, #empathy, #exasperation, #explain, #fault, #force, #Forcingpeople, #frustrating, #head-space, #heart, #hoped, #information, #insistence, #instructed, #involve, #know, #language, #lesson, #minds, #mistake, #mouths, #prevail, #rarely, #receptive, #recognize, #respectfully, #see, #shortsightedness, #speak, #stepped, #temperaments, #Thankfully, #thewannabesaint.com, #thoughtfully, #times, #together, #wholesituation, #willingness, #words, #wrong, @BrianLoging, Listen

Frustration

Apr 10

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

Frustration –

This morning I had an early appointment in Nashville to being a training. I put the address in my GPS app on my phone and off I went. It took me to the exact spot I’d entered into the phone but there was one problem, it was the wrong address. It took me a moment to realize my mistake until I literally got to the end of a dead-end road. Argh! I felt my frustration starting to grow. Instead of being 30 minutes early I was going to be late. I checked the address again, realized where I made my mistake, and set off in the right direction. Trying not to let my anxiety rise to a harmful level I turned on a three-lane road and stopped at a traffic light. I was in the far right lane, an SUV in the center lane, and a sports car in the left lane. I heard yelling and realized it was the SUV driver and the sports car driver having a road rage episode. I couldn’t make out much of what they were saying and the words I could understand I don’t dare repeat.

I sat there listening and watching the living embodiment of frustration out of control; testosterone, anger, and vitriol spewing out of both of them. It made me take stock of my mood and I realized it wasn’t worth getting upset over my mistake and to let it go. I did, arrived at the training on time and am thankful for the lesson two men out of control could teach me.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Life

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Tags: #address, #anger, #anxiety, #blessings, #checked, #dead-end, #embodiment, #episode, #exact, #frustration, #GPS, #grow, #harmful, #late, #lesson, #letitgo, #level, #listening, #living, #mistake, #mood, #outofcontrol, #realized, #rightdirection, #rise, #road, #roadrage, #setoff, #spewing, #spot, #starting, #takestock, #teach, #thankful, #thewannabesaint.com, #training, #understand, #upset, #Vitriol, #watching, #worth, #wrong, #yelling, @BrianLoging, moment

Expecting

Oct 7

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

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Expecting –

It is so had to do, acting without expecting. Two plus two equals four but life is not mathematics. One action does not necessarily equal an expected result.

Several years ago I was on staff at a large organization and following a particularly long meeting I was among a group of members talking in a hallway. The conversation didn’t last long but I said something in passing that hurt the feelings of a fellow staff member. I didn’t realize it until that evening when I received a long email about what I had said and done. It took me by complete surprise. I sent an email back immediately apologizing and promising to be more careful with my words and received another email outlining other things I had done that this staff member found irritating and insulting. Again, I apologized and began looking at my words and behavior to see if I could find all of these faults. I didn’t agree with everything this staff member wrote but I felt they deserved enough respect from me to pray for greater self-awareness in all my interactions.

This is why expectations can be so dangerous. We may know, or hope we know, our intentions as we develop and cultivate relationships, make our way with others along this path called life. We may not wish to hurt others or offend them. Our life can be about peace and kindness but it may not always be perceived that way. We must purposefully live well but not expect our lives to be beyond questioning. When we make a mistake or someone is hurt by something we have done, even if we believed we acted innocently, we seek forgiveness and restoration so that our lives match the intent of our hearts.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Life

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Tags: #agree, #believed, #beyond, #cultivate, #dangerous, #deserved, #develop, #expect, #expectations, #forgiveness, #greater, #hearts, #hope, #hurt, #innocently, #intent, #intentions, #interactions, #kindness, #life, #mistake, #offend, #path, #perceived, #pray, #purposefully, #questioning, #respect, #restoration, #self-awareness, #way, #wish, Peace, Relationships

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Double Back

Balancing Act

Can You Hear Me?

Frustration

Expecting

Brian Loging, OSBO

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Double Back

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Balancing Act

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Frustration

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Expecting

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Brian Loging, OSBO

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