No Other Choice –
I was greeted today by one of the fathers in my Incarcerated Father’s Class by a resident with a nasty looking black eye. We emphasize choice in this class. Our motto is; “Good choices make good men, and good men make good fathers.” I asked the owner of the shiner what happened and he said he was in a fight. I then asked; “Did you make a good choice?” His answer was yes. He explained sometimes you have no other choice.
I couldn’t argue with him. It would be nice if the world was black and white, clear negative and positives, defined good choices and bad. However, the world offers us a lot of grays. There are times when the choice of going one way or another doesn’t exist. You go forward, with your best intentions and wisdom and hope it works out.
These can be our best or worst moments. They certainly define us or scar us for life. When life doesn’t offer any options, no other choices, we hold our breath and cautiously step into an uncertain future.
Posted in Mindfulness
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We live in a world where our thoughts are too easily written down and dispersed on an unexpecting and often unwanting public. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and more give us the options of pairing our words with pictures, emojis, aesthetic backgrounds as if that makes them seem more important. What we are missing is a filter which asks; “Does this post hurt you or others?” If the answer is; “Yes” then we don’t put it out there for the whole world to see.
The question; “Does this hurt you or others?” should also apply to what we say in the real world to each other. I’ve heard people say things to another human being which should simply never be said. The problem is “No Filter.” We have latched on to the idea that if we think it, it is worth expressing, and we don’t consider the consequences of the words we speak.
Words, perhaps more than any other weapon, has the power to create or destroy life. May we use them carefully.
Posted in Mindfulness
Tags: #aesthetic, #apply, #backgrounds, #carefully, #consequences, #consider, #create, #destroy, #dispersed, #emojis, #expressing, #filter, #heard, #humanbeing, #hurt, #idea, #important, #latched, #life, #missing, #never, #NoFilter, #options, #pairing, #pictures, #post, #power, #problem, #public. #Facebook, #realworld, #simply, #speak, #Twitter, #unexpecting, #unwanting, #weapon, #Written, Instagram, People, Thoughts, World
Choose Wisely –
Yesterday I needed to drive into town and sign some important documents. I wasn’t excited about dropping everything I was doing and running this errand but there was no other option. On the way, it seemed like every light was red, the road was occupied with the slowest of drivers, and I even had to pull over for a funeral procession.
By the time I arrived to sign the papers my patience was wearing thin. I walked in, told the woman behind the counter my name and what documents I needed to sign. She looked all around her with no luck. There were three two-drawer metal filing cabinets behind her. She pulled on one with no luck and began looking for the keys. “Sigh!” She found the key to one of the filing cabinet and said over her shoulder to me; “It has to be in one of these!” “Ugh!”
She opened the first one and no luck. She then looked for and found the key to the second one, opened it up and…no papers. Finding the third key she opened the last filing cabinet and; “Tada!” I signed the papers, told the woman thank you, and began to drive back home. I immediately became aware that my patience was thin and I needed to breathe out the tension and anxiety and breathe in stillness and peace.
- As much as I like to consider myself a contemplative, patience isn’t my default emotional and mental place. Like the filing cabinets; I start with frustration, move to irritation with patience and letting go, seeming to be one of the last drawers I open.
- I hope, pray, that one day instead of patience and peace being one of the final options they will be my first and only.