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Popped in the Mouth

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Popped in the Mouth

The other day I heard a discussion between two women about a mom “popping” her adolescent child in the mouth. I cringed as the two women agreed sometimes it has to be done when a kid won’t stop talking back. This week #RoaseanneBarr was “popped” for using words which degrade and dehumanize others. I once had an adult tell me they were “popped” in the mouth by a parent when they were in college for not respecting her parents. I think all of us at one point or another have been “popped” because of something coming out of mouths that weren’t needed, necessary or helpful.

The swift punishment “popping” implies is that the words were barely out of the mouth before being punished. I’ve reflected on the words which have come out of my mouth over the years and if I was punished for every wrong phrase or wording, egotistical and asinine thing I’ve let loose I’d be hurting a long time and most of the pain would be deserved.

Words matter! A famous wisdom quote reads; “Do not speak unless it improves upon silence.” Perhaps if we were slower to speak the world would have less pain and more love.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

POP! Goes the Ego

RULE OF LIFE: Getting your bubble popped is never as much fun as popping someone else’s.

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Over at Neatorama there is a great video on making and popping giant bubbles.

A long, long time ago in a neighborhood far, far away blowing bubbles was the perfect way to pass an afternoon. A small plastic container with magic liquid and a wand with a circle on the end allowed you to make bubbles appear with a mere puff of air. A quick learner could make double, triple, large, small and multiple bubbles with ease. However, no matter how intricate and complex, the person who blew the biggest bubble was the best.

Egos are like bubble contests, some are impressive, others are complex, but the biggest always lay claim to being the best. We all know people in our lives with massive hubris. They never miss a chance to let you know their accomplishments, they’re in charge, they’re in this to win. In subtle and not so subtle ways everyone around them know they don’t measure up. Whether we live, work, are friends with or related to folks with overstuffed opinions of themselves we must be careful not to get sucked into their ego bubble.

One of our first responses is to POP these people. Not physically, though tempting, but through our own subtle and not so subtle ways of chipping away at their oversized confidence and bravado.  It is slippery knowing when, where, how and if to attempt to pop a swollen personality. Wisdom and life teach us most of the time it’s not worth the splatter.

When we look at our motives for wanting to let the air out of a gas-bag we often discover it’s more about our own ego than theirs. Our feelings have been hurt, we’re underappreciated, our ideas and opinions are not heard, or our egotistical counterpart just gets on our every nerve! Even as adults we want to win the contest.

Being mindful and expanding our egos don’t go together. Letting go of feelings of being bullied, embarrassed, ignored and disregarded isn’t easy. Coming to grips with our own swollen selves can be humbling.

Life isn’t about competing with one another. It’s not having what another possesses. It’s learning who you are and knowing that is enough.

“He who is not content with what he has, will not be content with what he wants.” –Socrates

blessings and burstings,

bdl

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