Blog Archives
Perspective
Perspective –
I was talking with a friend recently who believes in Bigfoot. My friend is intelligent, philosophical, pragmatic and practical. When I found out he was a believer in Bigfoot I was surprised. At one time he was an avid outdoorsman and through his study and interviews with other people has been convinced by Bigfoot sightings and other evidence. When we talked about it I told him I didn’t believe in Bigfoot. There simply isn’t enough proof that people have seen what they think they saw or that the “evidence” is purposefully or accidentally being misinterpreted. However, I always make this caveat with my friend. “Just because I don’t believe in Bigfoot doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.”
Wisdom teaches us to be careful about our beliefs. Too often we want to force our convictions on another and convince them to think like we do. The first step on the path of wisdom is the truth that we know nothing. It is the first and only place to begin and exist. Wisdom is a paradox. The more we know, learn, practice, the more we don’t know.
We live in a world full of people convinced they see reality “as is” and if you don’t see it their way you’re wrong! Religion, politics, cultures, ethnicities, separate us into groups and life becomes about “us” and “them.” Maybe, if we listened attentively, spoke softly, and held our fragile beliefs as bubbles ready to pop any time and open us up to a world we didn’t even know existed, we’d celebrate humility instead of hubris.
For more writings, articles, and posts, please visit: http://www.thewannabesaint.com
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
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To Think
To Think –
I am currently teaching a men’s class on Wednesday evenings in a city that’s an hour away from home. This means on Wednesday afternoon and evening I have a bit of time on my hands. I spent most of it yesterday talking with fathers on the phone. A couple of hours to myself gives me time to think about my day, week, schedule and the materials I will be teaching and how the class went on the way back.
Thinking is a balancing act for someone like me with a Severe Anxiety Disorder. If I’m not careful thinking can turn to rumination and going over and over a situation, interaction, occasion in my mind. I described it one time to my therapist; “My over-thinking is like bubblegum. You chew on it and for a while, you get something tasty. Soon, however, all the flavor is gone and you’re chewing a piece of wet rubber.” I try to be aware of my thoughts and if I’m fixating on a particular subject. When I catch myself I turn on the radio, a podcast or music.
Wisdom tells us; “We cannot stop thoughts from entering the door of our minds
but we do not have to serve them tea.“
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Almost Finished
Almost Finished –
I started mowing the grass today around 10:00AM. According to the weather report, a front was pushing through our area near 1:00PM and it takes about 3 hours to mow and weed our yard. It was hot and humid when I began, the skies were blue with puffy clouds. It was warm enough to sweat even though I was on a riding mower. I stopped to drink some water when I finished the back and noticed a patch of dark clouds coming my way. I continued mowing and all of a sudden the wind picked up, the temperature dropped and the skies grew dark. I increased my speed and hoped to get finished in time. Fortunately, I did complete the mowing but the bottom fell out of the sky and I couldn’t squeeze the weeding in because of the heavy rain.
As the rain pounded on the tin roof of our porch I reflected on life and all that is done and left undone. We fill our lives with appointments, events, occasions. We think we have time to do everything which needs to be done. The sun shines on us, the blue skies and the beauty of being alive gives us the illusion that time is on our side. Then a storm of disappointment, disillusion, danger, and death reminds us that time is limited and we can’t take even a moment for granted.
#BenjaminFranklin said; “Be careful with every moment. For these are what life is made.”
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Bait and Hook
Bait and Hook –
This morning I was zipping through emails before heading to the office for a training. I had three from our IT department and opened each of them giving a cursory read. One was an update to a system, another was reminding me of a piece of equipment I needed to pick up and the third was dealing with switching to a new email system. Each one looked legit and I told myself to get set up on the new email system next time I was near my computer. I finished, went to work and as I sat in my chair waiting for the training to start I received a new email another one from IT. The email stated firmly “do not click on the link to the new email system! This is a phishing and spam scam!” “Whew!’ I thought to myself, ‘that was close!'” I was going to click on the link, would have clicked on it if I had the time this morning. I’m usually good at spotting bad emails but because this one was in a collection of legitimate emails I assumed it was fine.
In life, as in IT, we have to be careful not to let everything come together as one big pile of things we need to do. If we do we run the risk of missing something important, doing something harmful, and allowing life to be the sum of its parts instead of each moment being an eternity in itself. Life is hard and there’s so many things we think we need to do. Wisdom teaches us to let go a lot of the minutiae, the things which aren’t really important, and to focus on what counts. When we are able to take life a breath at a time we find love, kindness, presence more easily and things which are harmful to us and those we love more visible and avoidable.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Hope for the Future
Hope for the Future –
There’s nothing like opening a box full of stuff to get people’s attention. This morning I was at the office early because I had several boxes of children’s books to sort and inventory. We are having reading events for dads and their kids in the next few months and the books for these came in last week. They were colorful with big bold letters and wonderful pictures of dinosaurs, bears, monsters, children with their parents, llamas, and fantastical creatures.
As we inventoried these books I couldn’t help but think back to my childhood and books I read or had read to me. Reading is essential for any child’s long-term success. If you can read you can do almost anything you put your mind to. These books could spark a love of learning in a child’s heart that will benefit them and humanity and that’s awesome.
I also sighed as I thought of many people today who squander the gift of reading and learning, using it to reinforce and fortify their opinions, position on social and religious issues, instead of allowing the written word to open them up to new ideas, the discovery of concepts, notions, theories, and truths never conceived.
Here’s hoping our children are better learning pioneers than those who’ve come before.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Spoiler Free
Spoiler Free –
I spoiled a television show for someone. I didn’t mean to. We were listing what shows we liked and followed and she mentioned one in particular. I told her it was a good show and the way she talked about the episodes and the people and certain situations I thought she was on season two when in fact she was still working her way through the first season. I said; “Can you believe he killed that guy?” and all I received in return was a blank stare. My stomach dropped and I knew what I had done and there was no way out of it. “I am so sorry. I thought, from the way you were talking, you knew this! Again, I am so sorry!” She said it was; “okay” but I know from having television or streaming shows and movies spoiled for me it just isn’t the same when something shocking happens and you know its coming.
I was talking with another parent a couple of weeks ago about children. We agreed that life is anything but a spoiler. Twins, raised in the same way, can turn out completely different. Situations, events happen to one group of people and they all react differently. We are in every way a unique creation never to be repeated. Yet, at times, we give out advice like we know what’s going to happen. A person comes to us with a problem and instead of listening and simply being present we say; “Oh! That’s happened to me. Here’s what you should do.” We think, speak and act as if we have the answers to a problem we’ve never encountered before.
Wisdom teaches us to be careful with advice and to respect the one of a kind journey we all travel together.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Cling
Cling –
I spent the day helping a friend go through the belongings of a dear loved one who has passed. It’s tough going. One might think it’s the expensive toys, gadgets, and gizmos which you’d want to hold on to but instead, it’s the little things; sheets of paper, old license plates, CDs, notepads. Items which wouldn’t sell at a yard sale or purchased at Goodwill are of immense value, a treasure to the ones who remain.
Death is often an open wound. Scabs may form, some healing might occur, but grasping at past memories and experiences, strains and pulls apart the wound and the pain, heartbreak of loss returns. Its hard letting go. It’s difficult to say; “goodbye.” but death demands we do it again and again in many ways, on many occasions and you wonder if it will ever be the last time.
Moving on requires that one live open-handed, no clinging to earthly, temporal things, allowing the shared life of the one who is gone to be enough.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Torture
Torture –
Earlier this afternoon I tortured my Siberian Husky. I am sure that’s his point of view. Mine? I gave him a bath. He hates baths. From the time he was a puppy to now that he’s over thirteen years old when the water hits him and the soap is scrubbed into his thick fur he begins to howl and wail like someone is beating him! He tries running away, shaking the soapy water off, and is uncooperative from beginning to end. If it wasn’t so frustrating it would be funny.
I think many of us are like Trooper. There are hard, difficult, challenging things we go through that we’d rather not experience. However, it could be these very things that help us grow, get rid of old hurts, habits, and hangups. It may seem like torture when we go through it but afterward, we may even be thankful.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Starting Over
Starting Over –
I was speaking with a friend this week who struggles with anger. We were trying to figure out how to take a breath before responding to a situation or a person who triggers his angry responses. We talked about tricks and tips to get him to breathe in fully and exhale before whatever words were forming on his tongue. I told him; “At that moment think, see with your mind what the consequences of your words are going to be.” It’s the discipline of ‘the space in between.’ The greater the space in between the stimuli and the response the better. Take time to think, to breathe, there is healing, understanding, awareness, and acceptance in that moment. Use it.”
With each breath is a new beginning, a starting over, an opportunity to live and give life.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Putting Feet to Your Faith
Putting Feet to Your Faith –
This morning, in worship service, when one of the staff members went up on stage and gave the announcements she talked about a missions class. She said; “This class will help you put feet to your faith!” To my knowledge, this is the first time I heard this phrase or at least the first time it resonated with me. I liked the idea of beliefs and action coexisting, what I think, say and do being in sync.
Later I reacted to a post from someone on Facebook who’s having a rough couple of weeks. There has been progressing in the recent past but for some reason, the last month or so battles thought won were being fought again. I replied to her post; “I understand and live these “honest and ugly” truths. It’s tough, feeling like you have to start over, but I’m reminded by wisdom and therapy that we’ve grown, have learned/are learning, experienced a new normal and the starting line has been moved. We may not be where we want to be but thankfully are not where we started.”
Even when it seems like our journey is two steps forward and three, maybe five, steps back we are making progress. We ask, no plead, for the faith to keep walking, to put feet to our faith.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Surfing or Drowning
Surfing or Drowning –
I just finished reading an article from seven years ago today about a father and son who were killed by a drunk driver. The mom shared it on social media and the heartache is still present and the wound raw. I can’t imagine the pain. I knew the father a little. He was in our church’s youth group. He was a few years older than me but always seemed cool. He was an athlete. He ran, biked, swam, and surfed. The morning dad and son were killed they were training for a triathlon. The father was named after his father and the son carried on the tradition. He was the III.
How do you have hope in the midst of such loss? How do you not drown in sorrow? How do you not get lost in such darkness? I don’t think there’s an easy answer. Quips and quotes don’t begin to address the brokenness and reveal our lack of intimacy with death. We do everything we can to avoid it. Most of us try to prolong our lives by any means necessary. When death finally does come we are quick to make the arrangements, organize a memorial or funeral service and push past it as fast as possible. But even then, death finds a way to corner us, trap us, confront us. After the hustle and bustle of meals, flowers, sympathy cards, and services we find ourselves alone when death, misery, mourning, comes calling.
Experts tell us that when we are caught in a riptide to not fight the current or it will surely drown its victim. Let it grab you and then slowly, moving parallel to the shore, slip from its grip. I think this is how we deal with the loss of those we love. There’s no escaping and fighting and refusing to acknowledge its power end in certain defeat. To allow it take hold, scare us, shake our faith, sweep our “normal” life away, but not giving up is the key. Slowly our strength returns, we regain our bearings, we slip from its grip, rise above the waters and live.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Gathered Together
Gathered Together –
All over the world today youths and people of every color, creed, and nationality, clergy, organizational representatives, politicians, movie and music stars, are gathered together to protest gun violence and by their voices and presence hope to convince those who have the power to do something about people dying. You don’t have to agree with their position to respect their right and motivation to come together and show their solidarity and support. In this crazy, mixed up and messed up world at least they are doing something.
“Decisions are made by those who show up.” -Anonymous
It is amazing what a group of people, gathered together, with peace, justice, kindness, and determination can accomplish. Too often we sit on the sidelines and voice our opinions, make fun or mock those who think differently than us and are doing what their heart, emotions, and spirits, say is right and good. Perhaps we’ll make mistakes, maybe our ideas aren’t totally thought out and ordered. However, can you imagine an international movement where everyone decided to take action, do good, seek justice and change the world for the better? I can.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Intimacy
Intimacy –
This afternoon I stopped by a store to run in and grab a few items. When I parked there was a man sitting in his car and as I pulled into a spot he was staring at me. I gave him a head nod and didn’t think much of it As I gathered my things and exited the truck I looked again and he was no longer visible because his, I am assuming, girlfriend was bending sideways across the center console “appreciating him.” She was kissing him and whatever else because I averted my eyes not wanting to see anything that would burn an image in my brain! I went into the store came out a few minutes later and was hoping the car had gone but alas it was still there. Most of the windows were fogged up except the driver’s window and the driver was smoking a cigarette. I looked at my keys, hopped in the truck and drove away, quickly.
Intimacy is one of the greatest emotions and connections humans can share. Lust, on the other hand, is hormonal, selfish, addicting, and satisfied in ways which can hurt others. Our world is filled with lust. Lust for power, fame, money, reputation, knowledge can all be subjects of our lust if they are used only for our selfish purposes. True intimacy is also powerful but the opposite of lust. Lasting intimacy is giving ourselves to another. We have intimacy when we decide to put the other one first, serve the other. In a world where lust burns quickly, brightly, we need those who would rather do a slow burn which lasts a lifetime.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Tender Touch
Tender Touch –
I washed a friend’s hair today. That’s a sentence most people don’t type often. It was an interesting experience. Washing my hair isn’t nearly as exciting. I think it’s because I don’t have much hair but also because I do it almost every day. I know how hot I like the water, the amount of shampoo I need, the best way to move my hands and arms so I can do a good and quick job, the pressure it takes to get my head and hair clean but not so hard I hurt myself. When washing another’s hair you aren’t sure about any of these things so you are more hesitant, you listen to their instructions intently, careful you are cleaning their head and hair but not scrubbing their scalp off! I did a decent job, spilling some water on their shirt, needed more shampoo because they actually have hair, but overall they were a satisfied client.
Human interaction comes in all shapes and sizes. We connect with each other in a variety of ways. Hopefully, we come out the better for it afterward. Often we take these joinings for granted. We interact with each other and forget how important these linkings are to who and what we are and become. It’s a delicate dance to make sure we don’t violate each other’s space and move together allowing each one to lead and follow, instruct and listen, b secure enough in the relationship to simply be or change entirely.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Sound of Silence
Sound of Silence –
For the last few days, the sounds of rain has been bouncing off the tin roof which covers our porch. I love the sound but hour after hour, day after day, and you’re ready for a break. Finally, today around noon, the rain stopped. I sat in my living room and listened to the limbs shed their build-up of water and after a while, there was only silence. I wonder if this was how Noah felt being the Ark, listening to the pounding of the rain and the waves and when it stopped did he pause and enjoy the sound of nothing falling on his big boat?
There’s been flooding in our area, yards are swamped, the drainage ditches are overflowing. Even though rain is a wonderful act of creation you can only handle so much of a good thing. Reflecting on the silence I also thought about what we desire in our lives. Most of us do not desire the “bad” with the “good”. In our imaginations, if we had all the power, we wouldn’t face the difficulties, the challenges, the mountains we climb on our journey from the cradle to the grave. Everything would be smooth with no setbacks or failures. If life was this way would we get sick of the “good”? Would we grow? What kind of person would we be?
There’s no way to honestly answer these questions but I do wonder if life would be worth living if we got all the things we think make life worth living for.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Temporary
Temporary –
The sun, which shone so brightly the last couple of days filling my spirit and mind with images of spring, is gone today, replaced by gray, gloomy clouds. My wife’s flu bug which bit her last week seems to have been squished and she’s on the mend. The weekend is winding down and soon a new week will start.
I commented to a friend today about a photograph taken about 4 years ago that; “sometimes it seems long ago and other times yesterday.” I think that’s life. When younger I was told; “time moves faster as you get older.” It didn’t make sense to me then but now, on the other side of the hill (midlife), it’s a boulder rolling faster and faster.
The present moment, where we long to continuously dwell, is the one place that brings thankfulness, humility, and acceptance. We are thankful because we are only “grass that whithers, blows away, and its place remembers it no more.” Every moment is precious, even the ones we’d rather not experience. We are humbled by the brevity of ourselves and the things around us. Nothing is permanent which we can touch, see, feel, hear, or taste. “All things are passing away.” By accepting this truth we can choose to consciously, deliberately, live leaving nothing unfinished, and embrace this flash of light we call being alive.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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What’s on Your Plate?
What’s on Your Plate? –
This afternoon, at a county health council meeting, a speaker from Vanderbilt Hospital gave us a lecture on the importance of heart health. February is Heart Health Month so it was certainly appropriate. He talked about healthy eating even stating; “If it tastes good it’s not good for you!” That certainly got everyone’s attention. He softened the blow a little by following up with limiting the amount of unhealthy, high fat, processed, high-calorie food and increasing healthy choices. The speaker had arrived late and lunch had been served before his lecture. The food wasn’t what he’d call the best in choices but not the worst either. After he sat down and the meeting dismissed someone mentioned to the attendees that there was plenty of food left over from the lunch and to please take some home. I can only imagine what the speaker was thinking as he watched people make “to go” plates. It certainly is a difficult job to get people to think differently, choose differently.
One of the disciplines of mindfulness is mindful eating. It is the recognition that everything we put in our mouths comes from the world around us. It’s not just consuming but being aware that each piece of meat, every spoonful of veggies, a bite of fruit, is a result of the creation we all apart of, participate in and exist in intimate connection. Too often, however, we just consume. Not only food but almost everything in our lives is used and abused, grabbed and possessed, with no thought of creation or consequence to our consumption.
What’s on our plate is, and is more than, the food we eat but also what we allow to fill up our lives.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Driverless
Driverless –
Driverless automobile technology doesn’t seem like something that might happen but is happening and will impact all of us soon. I was listening to NPR this week and the person being interviewed said that everyone will have a driverless automobile by the year 2050. I’m not sure what the 70+-year-old will think but the 45+-year-old is skeptical. Maybe it’s the loss of control, maybe it’s watching too many sci-fi movies but driverless cars, trucks, semis zipping down the road all dependent on a group of engineers and designers seems too futuristic but it’s where we are going.
In my lifetime I’ve gone from record players to compact disc players to mp3 players which could hold 100 songs to my phone being able to play any tune I can think of at the press of an icon under a piece of glass. 30 years ago that would’ve been unthinkable so driverless cars are coming whether I am ready or not.
Life and its continuous change are shocking. Places we are now on the journey probably aren’t where we thought we’d be. Plans we thought were “set in stone” have been shattered and adjusting, accepting and letting go require more strength than we think we possess. There are days when we feel like we are steering our lives and other seasons when life keeps taking the wheel and driving to unknown and sometimes unwanted destinations.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Hearing is Believing
Hearing is Believing –
A driver slid off the road during a snowstorm. His cellphone was useless and so he walked until he found a house with an old mule munching on some hay near a barn in the backyard. He knocked on the door of the house and a farmer answered. The man explained his predicament and the farmer said he’d help. The farmer put on a coat, exited the house and walked over to the old mule, put a bridle on it and the three walked back to the car. As they were traveling the driver of the car wondered if the old mule could be of much help. They arrived back at the car and the farmer turned the mule around, attached the rope it carried to the car and to the mule and began yelling; “Go, Joe, go, Fred, go, Jim, go Barney!” The old mule pulled as hard as it could and the car slowly came out of the ditch and back on the road. The driver was amazed and thanked the farmer profusely! Before he drove off he had one question he had to ask the farmer. “Why,’ he inquired, ‘when the mule was pulling the car, did you yell; Go, Joe, go, Fred, go, Jim, go Barney?” “Well,’ replied the old farmer scratching his chin and then petting the mule. ‘Ol’ Barney here doesn’t see too good and I knew if he thought he was pulling by himself he’d never believe he could do it. So, I made him think he was on a team so he’d have the confidence he needed to get the job done.”
Wisdom teaches us that we are never alone. Whatever the situation, it is never so dire that whether we can see it or not, the help we need is there to do what needs to be done.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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Who Cares?
Who Cares?
This morning, in worship service, the pastor asked; “Who’s rooting for the Philadelphia Eagles tonight? Who’s going for the New England Patriots? Who doesn’t care? Who didn’t know the Superbowl was being played today?” There were hands and voices raised for each question.
Around 120 million people will watch the Superbowl tonight. That’s over a third of the population of this country which is roughly 323 million. Amazing to me that we can watch a football game together but can’t seem to unite over much else. It’s also a surprise the 2/3 of America doesn’t care about the game at all!
I will be rooting for the Philadelphia Eagles. I don’t have anything against the Patriots they’ve just won it so many times I think it would be nice to give it to someone else for a change. The coverage for the big game started early this morning. The network broadcasting the Superbowl had a great interview with a Patriot’s receiver, his wife, and children. It was a reminder that individual people, with unique stories, make up the teams.
It’s a shame we don’t remember that when we are attacking others for their political, cultural and religious opinions and beliefs. We cast a large net over those who don’t think like us and label them; “bad” or “good” according to our own fallible judgments.
Maybe, if we could see the individual, listen to their story, discover we’re all trying to make it the best we know how, we would realize when we fight all of us lose.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
Keep What Works
Mar 21
Posted by thewannabesaint.com
Keep What Works –
This advertisement was in my Twitter feed this morning. When I was a pastor who had to prepare and deliver a message each Sunday I loved the times when after the service people would come up and ask a question, make a comment or even challenge something I said during the message. It meant they were listening! I would listen to them and then discuss whatever was on their mind. At the end of the conversation I would often tell them; “Don’t take what I say as the truth. Go search for yourself. Find out if the all or part of the message is for you and keep what works and leave the rest.” I understood that depending on where we were on our path greatly determined what our minds, emotions, and spirits could process and apply at any given moment. Most of us have had the experience of someone excitedly telling us about something they heard someone say, or read in a book, and how it changed their lives. While we are grateful for our friend’s epiphany we also think to ourselves; “I’ve told them this a thousand times and they never listened!” It’s because they weren’t ready. The good piece of advice, the important life lesson we told them wasn’t ready to be heard.
Wisdom teaches us that many truths surround us presently. However, we can only perceive a few, if any, because we are unaware, distracted. The best news is that these truths are timeless and sooner or later they’re ready to be received and applied. Sometimes we become frustrated because we seem to be learning the same things over and over. We need to learn to give ourselves a break and trust that one day the truth we’ve been searching for will be received and kept because it works.
blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com
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