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Hovering

Hovering –

This past Wednesday night, on my way home from a Dad’s Community Group, I was lost in thought on a two-lane road headed home. One moment I looked in my rearview mirror and there was nothing the next time a huge, black, Hummer was riding my bumper. I had no idea where it came from but the driver of this large SUV was in a hurry. There was no place for me to move over, nor dotted lines for him to pass. He stayed there in the middle of my rearview mirror hovering like a black cloud. I instantly became anxious. I have a mid-size Nissan Frontier which pales in size to a Hummer. I wasn’t going to slam on my brakes because you never know what’s going to happen when you pit aggression against aggression. I also didn’t want to speed on a windy, country road at sundown. So, I took a breath, accepted there was nothing I could do about this giant vehicle hovering behind me and tried to drive as I normally would. Eventually, the Hummer turned off on a side road and I made it home safely.

I reflected on that Hummer and life. There are times, on our journey, where difficulties, intimidation, challenges appear and hover over us. We try to choose the best way to get away from them but nothing works. Eventually, we accept that we’re going to have to learn to live with this threat to our way of life. We remember to breathe and keep going the best way we know how. Maybe it goes as quickly as it came. Maybe it’s here to stay. Either way, we trust the road, trust ourselves and find our way home.

For more posts, reflections, poems, and other writings, please visit:
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blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)

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The Question of Freedom

Jul 4

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

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The Question of Freedom –

This morning a question was asked by a friend; “What are you celebrating this July 4th?” My answer was; “I’m not sure.” The easy answer is freedom, but freedom from what? I feel like we live in a time of disillusion and division. People are losing their right to express themselves no matter where their theology, political allegiances or cultural upbringing. We have become an intolerant and shaming nation. Those who are different, not like us, don’t share our beliefs and convictions, we condemn without either side given the chance to express ideas and discuss. Instead, we see different as a threat and label them as unworthy to be an American.

What does it mean to be free? What does it mean to be a patriot? What does it mean to be nationalistic? At one point in our history, being a patriot was speaking out against the government when it stepped over the line and into people’s lives, didn’t treat everyone (EVERYONE) as equal, needed to be put back in its place. We have exchanged our right as citizens of America and traded it in for members of a political party. We are republicans and democrats, conservatives and progressives, commoners and elites. Both sides claim they’re under attack, true Americans, and those outside of their political persuasions as “destroying our country!” The hate, vitriol, attacks, insults, spewed by both parties and their followers is heartbreaking and stomach turning.

So, what am I celebrating this July 4th? The freedom to write this without fear. Another question is; “What am I mourning this July 4th?” The loss of civility, being one people, allowing politics to define who we are, our neighbor is, and what being an American means.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Life

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Untangle

May 4

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

Image result for tangled hosepipe

Untangle –

Yesterday I made a promise to my wife. Actually, it was more of a threat. I threatened to leave the hose pipe outside all winter instead of putting it up in the fall. The reason for this is no matter what I try it all seems to be one giant tangled mess when I pull it out in the spring. One of my chores on Thursday was to untangle the jumbled mess of about three hundred feet of hose pipe. First I grabbed and dragged out most of it. Then I detached the ends to make them easier to work with. After this, I pulled each pipe end going over and under the other until I finally had one section free! When I did this six or seven times all the sections were in their own place and then hooking them together again one at a time I was able to run the hose pipe to the different areas of the yard. Whew! It was a hard, difficult job but had to be done.

In my work with men, fathers, and families, the initial times we meet to set up a plan of learning and action can seem like wrestling with a jumbled mess of hose pipe. However, with time and patience slowly learning, finding and breaking down the challenges, habits, hurts, and hang-ups, we can begin to put the pieces back together again.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Life, Mental Health

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Tags: #action, #areas, #backtogether, #begin, #blessings, #breakingdown, #challenges, #detached, #different, #difficult, #drug, #easier, #families, #fathers, #Finally, #finding, #giant, #grabbed, #habits, #hang-ups, #hard, #hooking, #hurts, #individual, #initial, #instead, #job, #jumbledmess, #learning, #meet, #men, #mess, #nomatterwhat, #oneatatime, #outside, #over, #patience, #pieces, #plan, #promise, #pulled, #reason, #section, #setup, #slowly, #tangled, #thewannabesaint.com, #threat, #threatened, #Under, #Untangle, #Whew, #work, #workwith, #wrestling, @BrianLoging, Free

Curiosity

May 3

Posted by thewannabesaint.com

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Curiosity –

Last week I wrote about a family of rabbits living under our shed. Yesterday I discovered one of the parents has become braver. I had let the dog out to take care of his business and realized too late there was a bunny in his vicinity. The rabbit watched Trooper as I watched it. It was perfectly still, on high alert, but didn’t move. Finally, our husky moved on and the rabbit relaxed until Trooper came bounding toward the front door ready to come in. It was then the bunny decided to high-tail it back under the porch.

A couple of weeks ago a rabbit ran right in front of Trooper and he casually looked at it and went about his duties. When he was younger he would’ve chased, and probably caught, the four-legged hopper. However, now that he is almost thirteen years old he conserves his energy for playing with us or sniffing the entire yard.

I wondered if the rabbit doesn’t feel afraid because Trooper has never chased it. Does his natural curiosity override his life-saving senses? As someone who lives with high anxiety, I too am “ready to run, fight, freeze” at the slightest threat. However, after I realize certain people aren’t a threat to harm, insult, shun me I relax and become curious enough to discover connection and relationship.

In a fast-paced busy world, it’s hard to take time to establish connections and build friendships. Hopefully, those of us who are more hesitant won’t be left behind.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Posted in Mindfulness

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Tags: #blessings, #braver, #build, #busyworld, #casually, #caught, #certain, #chased, #connection, #connections, #conserves, #Curiosity, #curious, #decided, #discover, #discovered, #duties, #establish, #fast-paced, #feelafraid, #fight, #freeze, #friendships, #front, #hard, #harm, #hesitant, #high-tail, #highalert, #highanxiety, #hopefully, #insult, #leftbehind, #life-saving, #looked, #move, #natural, #neverchased, #override, #perfectly, #playing, #ready, #realized, #relax, #relaxed, #run, #senses, #shun, #slightest, #still, #taketime, #thewannabesaint.com, #threat, #toolate, #toward, #vicinity, #watched, #wondered, @BrianLoging, Energy, People, Relationship

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Hovering

The Question of Freedom

Untangle

Curiosity

Brian Loging, OSBO

@BrianLoging

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…..a place for sojourners on this spiritual path called life

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Hovering

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The Question of Freedom

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Untangle

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Curiosity

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Brian Loging, OSBO

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