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Double Back

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Double Back

Last night, after dinner, Beth wanted a popsicle. I was getting up anyway and told her I’d get her one. I opened the top freezer door on the refrigerator and grabbed two by mistake. One fell to the floor and using the three-second rule I quickly stooped down and picked it up. Unbeknownst to me, the freezer door was swinging back and when I was two-thirds up I whacked the top back of my head on the corner of the freezer door. “OUCH!” It hurt so much I crumpled to the floor rubbing the wounded area. Beth heard me, came and looked at it and thought there would be bruising and soreness. She was right. It never occurred to me until it “hit me” that the door was doubling back. My mind was elsewhere and the freezer door brought me back to reality.

I was listening to someone describe addiction this week and they said; “It gets inside of you. You think you have a handle on it and then you begin to crave it. It comes back again and again and again.” I thought about other things which come around over and over. Grieving the loss of a loved one who has passed on, anger at being taken advantage of, bitterness at being betrayed, the pain of past memories and experiences that hurt us emotionally and physically, drug, alcohol and other addictions, friends who have negative influences on us, wounds which seem to never heal. All of these can cause us to crumple to the floor when they double back into our lives.

There is a needed balance of awareness and acceptance. Awareness is needed because perhaps we can see it coming and side-step the toll it would take on our minds and spirits. Acceptance is important because we are human, are not all-powerful, and difficult and challenging experiences are part of what makes us unique.

It is in this balance we may find wisdom and peace.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

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Taking Up Space

Taking Up Space

I have a friend who has a boss who is a pain! At least that’s how they describe him. He’s often in the staff’s way, interrupting staff’s conversations with co-workers and clients, calling last-minute meetings, forcing staff to take late, early, shortened lunches and breaks. My friend is a good employee and enjoys their job and interaction with the customers but this boss makes the job unbearable at times. I told my friend that this guy doesn’t seem easy to work for but also noticed he was creeping into other conversations and being complained about excessively. “Be careful,’ I said, ‘not to let this guy take up space in your head.”

It’s easy to let other people, things, difficulties, hardships rent a place in our noggin. These are issues we must deal with, live with and are forced to confront. However, if we aren’t careful, aware, they can begin to invade the other parts of our lives. We ruminate, stew, in our negative thoughts and this takes energy and a toll on us physically, emotionally and spiritually. Learning how to deal with problems, finding solutions that help us keep them from encroaching in unwanted areas, takes wisdom, practice and awareness.

“Keep the doors to your mind open. Let problems come and go. Do not serve them tea.”
-author unknown

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

 

Stolen

Stolen

Earlier this week someone took something that didn’t belong to them. I knew who it was but had to figure out how to ask for the item back without humiliating or embarrassing the person in front of his peers. At first, I asked the group if anyone had forgotten to return all items they had used. Nothing. So then, standing next to the man who had the item, I said; “Okay, who has (insert item name)?” The man started to laugh and gave it to me while the other people in the group laughed with him. “I almost got away with it,” he said with a chuckle in his voice. I breathed a sigh of relief because I knew I couldn’t let him walk away and a confrontation could have a detrimental impact on the progress we’ve made. Obviously, he’s still a work in progress but aren’t we all?

Good choices. It’s the cornerstone of all the services our organization does with males. Without good choices, life is harder than it needs to be and can exact a tremendous and painful toll. Old habits, ways of thinking, choosing the best isn’t easy but not impossible. Grace, kindness and an opportunity for forgiveness are things we all need.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Missing

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Missing

This afternoon I received a cryptic message about meeting someone. I read it, checked my calendar, read the text again and checked my calendar again. I had no meeting scheduled. I went back into my emails and did a search and still couldn’t find any messages regarding the meeting and still couldn’t find anything. The sender of the message, however, had a picture of her calendar with my acceptance! There was no doubt the meeting was scheduled and I was supposed to be there. Unfortunately, I was in another county so was unable to make it. We rescheduled but I don’t like missing appointments whether they are or are not on my calendar.

It’s bothered me all afternoon. When I got home I checked my emails and calendars again but still didn’t locate anything regarding the meeting. The only thing I can figure is I have a new work phone and the first couple of days I was messing with it, trying to figure it out, I accepted the meeting and then somehow deleted it. I don’t know if this is happened and might not ever know.

Schedules, calendars, planning out our days is a necessary discipline. If we don’t at least attempt to live in an ordered manner the chaos of everyday life will take its toll. However, no matter how much control we think we possess when our calendars and schedules are in sync life has a way of surprising us with events and experiences that don’t fit our schedule and forces us to accept and adjust.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

Telling It Like It Is

Telling it like it is” is not something I like to do. I try to always tell the truth but being brutally honest with someone is an uncomfortable style for me. I like a conversation rather than a confrontation.

However, there are times when; “telling it like it is” has to be done. Today, I needed to look someone in the eye and tell them a hard truth. Their body language told the story. They looked away, squirmed in their seat and their words back to me had a decided edge. We continued the talk and by the end of our time together we were on the same page but it was still tense.

There are moments when we must choose to speak the truth and suffer the consequences. Truth has a way of straining, testing, challenging and taking an exacting toll on relationships. Wisdom teaches us that the hard decision to be truthful, no matter the cost, is worth the possible consequences to others and ourselves.

blessings,
@BrianLoging (Twitter)
thewannabesaint.com

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